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At
home with the kids

Watching
the show

Africa's
worst outhouse

Unexpected
treat
.
.
..
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HOME SWEET HOME My neighbors watched the house and me very well. The first
home had occasional electricity, but it was at the end of an illegally
tapped line. There wasn't even enough power to run a tape recorder.
I knew for the second place I should move closer to the power company.
I found the perfect home in a section of town that had never had a
white person before.
I was the neighborhood entertainment.
It didn't matter what I was doing -- brushing my teeth in the
bushes, eating a grapefruit, or washing dishes. There was always
somebody ready to watch the Peace Corps show. I learned that
I never wanted to be famous. Two years of being a local celebrity
was enough.
My new home had indoor plumbing. I was in
heaven. If I had to get up in the middle of the night with diarrhea -- and I did --
I didn't even care. I don't want to talk about rushing to an outhouse with a
diarrhea attack. And, my first home had the worst outhouse in Africa -- possibly the
world. My friends knew to go to the bathroom before they came to visit. It
only took one visit to learn that lesson.
The outhouse was a two-roomer.
One door locked so I used that side. The room without a lock
was for the neighborhood. My side wasn't as bad as the public
one and there were still a million huge roaches in it. Once,
my guests decided drastic measures were needed. They had a can
of insecticide tossed into the pit. All million of those roaches
poured out onto the grass and died. And if all this wasn't bad
enough, the outhouse wasn't stable. You never could be sure
if it would really support you once you sat down. I kept the
door ajar and my hand on the door frame just in case. And then,
in the rainy season, you had to be quick or there was a back-splash!
Once as I cleaned house I almost
picked up a rag in the corner, but remembered I didn't own any rags.
On closer inspection, it was a scorpion! I ran to the kitchen,
grabbed a Tupperware dish, slapped it over that baby, and slid the
lid on underneath. I kept it there for a month to make sure
it was dead and then I took pictures. Some people had diamonds
in Liberia, but I had spiders, snakes, cockroaches, and scorpions.
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